Tuesday, November 16, 2010

I ruined football for my son

By Johnny Downtown

There are certain things, as a parent, that you are supposed to protect your kids from. Evil internet predators, cereals with too much sugar, the Victoria Secrets catalog (for different reasons with boys vs girls) and the flu are a few that come to mind. Well, I would like to add another one to that list and may even consider contributing to a PSA for it. Listen to me closely - DO NOT LET YOUR KIDS PARTICIPATE IN FANTASY FOOTBALL. I can assure you if you do, it will ruin the way they watch sports and discuss it with their friends. I'm considering pushing for legislation to require children to pass a test or actually get a license before they are allowed to participate. It is that damaging and here's why:
  • They will believe that Matt Schaub or even Tony Romo is a better quarterback than Peyton Manning. Those garbage numbers piled up during blowouts hold more weight than they should. 
  • True story - this morning I was talking to my 8 year old son about the Eagles-Redskins game last night and started to tell him about Michael Vick's otherworldly performance. His first question - how many fantasy points did Vick get? 
  • True story #2 - My son is a New York Giants fan and he is already trying to figure out "how" he is going to be rooting for his team on Sunday when they play the Eagles. He has the Eagles defense on his fantasy team so he is hoping the Giants score a lot, but, also throw a lot of interceptions.
  • The concept of defensive players is lost on my son. He only sees defense as a "team" that gets points for sacks and turnovers. 
Now I am not trying to sell you on "when I was your age, football was pure, we enjoyed it solely for the beauty of the game". Because that is so not true. Fantasy football may not have existed in the 1980's but picking games with a point spread did and I was knee deep in that when I was 8 years old. I can remember thinking, I hope the Raiders (my team) allow the Chiefs to tie the game, go into overtime and score a touchdown so they can cover the 5 point spread.  But at least then it was still a game concept and not a tale of individual performances.

Do I play fantasy sports? Of course I do - two NFL, two NBA, 1 NHL and 3 MLB. I enjoy the competition and strategy but I truly believe I have the proper perspective on it. I wish my son would just watch the games and then go out in the backyard and pretend he is Drew Brees or Adrian Peterson. Not ask me for an Arian Foster jersey because he is the leading RB in the fantasy universe.


1 comment:

  1. Ha ha..."like father, like son!" Just go out there with him and throw the ball, like I am sure you do.